When I saw that it had been 6 months since my last post I was shocked! It has been a year of good intentions- of ramblings on my phone that somehow never get turned into posts- but moves + toddler shenanigans + pregnancy have made it difficult to write. So today I decided to give up on all my half-written posts and just write 🙂
As I type I am two short days away from my due date.
Baby boy’s due date happens to be his grandpa’s birthday, so no pressure little guy but it would be pretty cool if you were on time! If not, oh well. Leila’s birthday is 9/11 so we are used to unseemly birthdays in this house (April 1st is a very real possibility for this baby’s birthday. After Leila, who was born three days late and a mere two hours from being born on 9/12, I have zero expectations.) In all seriousness, Leila’s birth was perfectly timed and I am perfectly content to let this baby come when he is ready 🙂
There are so many differences between this pregnancy and my first; in some ways I feel more prepared and knowledgeable, and in many other ways baby number two feels like a completely new experience. I had *hoped* to be a parenting expert by now but alas, I’m still very much on my toes here. I have been more confident in my own abilities, and surprisingly more organized (or maybe my efforts to get organized are just more efficient this time around because I have a better handle on what needs to get done.) I have also been a little more nervous for the labor and uncertain about how to juggle a toddler whom I very much adore with a baby who I am going to want to snuggle constantly.
One of the most notable differences between the two has been the contrast between my experience at a German hospital, where my inclinations for a natural approach to childbirth were very much the norm, and my experience at a hospital in Mississippi where natural birth is… pretty much anything but the norm.
When I showed up in labor at the hospital in Germany, the midwife took me by the hand, looked me in the eye and said firmly “you can do this.” Active labor is quite painful (no shock there!) so that was exactly what I needed to hear as a first time mom. I suspect that I will need to be my own advocate here, and I have come to terms with that- it makes me all the more thankful to have had such an empowering birth experience with Leila. This time around I know what I am capable of!
It has also been a shift to care for a toddler while pregnant. She keeps me busy. So busy that at times I have entirely forgotten I’m pregnant. At other times, I have felt 10X more pregnant because I am exhausted from chasing a tireless toddler and have fewer opportunities to rest. Having a toddler makes the pregnancy even sweeter, in spite of the exhaustion. It’s fun to watch Leila anticipate her baby brother- she is so pumped, and while she doesn’t understand all of the ways her world will change in the coming weeks I have full confidence that she will love her baby brother to pieces- and enjoy our remaining time as a trio.
Needless to say exciting changes are on the horizon! I hope to update soon with the birth story and the transition to becoming a family of four <3